8 Things You Miss When You’re Single

On By Chasing SpainIn Uncategorized
8 Things You Miss When You’re Single

 

Sharing your life and love with another person can be a beautiful and rewarding decision. While I do love my boyfriend, and wouldn’t trade him for a Friday night of swiping Tinder, there are freedoms lost when you are no longer single.


Whether you are dating, married, “together”, or whatever your status is set to in 2017, if it involves a relationship with another person, then you probably have experienced the things on our list.

 

The list is in no particular order except maybe someone of the most recent things my boyfriend has rattled of to me. All of the categories apply to both men and women, but being a female, I’ve done it through my point of view.


  1. Showering

 

 

Maybe this doesn’t apply to everyone, but at the beginning of a relationship it’s fun and exciting to hop in a shower together. You’re making bathing faster and saving water! As relationships progress, these showers can feel more like an obstacle course than a relaxing area. In a smaller tub, you have to slide by each other, while trying not to slip and crack your head. The worst part: one person is always left covered in soap and shivering, while the other gets to enjoy all the massaging hot water

  1. Farting
 
 
Please don’t even pretend to be grossed out. You know this one is true. How many farts have you held in or crop dusted so your s/o won’t breathe in the deathly fumes? Countless! Being in a relationship means cutting your farting down AT LEAST 50%, and you can forget if you want to let one rip in the comfort of your own bed.


Also under this category, I’d like to include using the bathroom in general. Do you want to see me pee? No. Well I don’t want to see you either. I don’t want to know about your bodily functions, but somehow these become a free for all when the relationship doors open up. I just want to be able to use the bathroom in peace, and for the only bodily gases that inhale to be my own.

  1. Eating


Don’t get me wrong, I like both cooking and ordering out. Also, when I created this category it was not because I don’t like eat with my significant other or in front of them. I just like my food to be MY FOOD. As in, you stick to your plate and I’ll stick to mind. I don’t mind sharing once in awhile, I’m not greedy, but when I placed my order for pad thai, I had me in mind, not you. I want to savor the flavor of the whole thing without having to worry about you wanting to eat it too. My dog always hangs around when I have food, but that doesn’t mean I’ll share with them either!


  1. Going out
 
 
 

Okay maybe I’m not the greatest drunk to ever take a shot of tequila, but my friends think I’m a good time! Now you have this other person in your life to judge you after a night out while you’re shoeless, crying, and sitting on the sidewalk of Manhattan surrounded by rats. Or even worse, they’re that person you have to take care of! I can barely take of drunk me, let alone drunk you. Sometimes you just want to let loose with your friends because they’ve dealt with your shenanigans for years, so if you piss them off they’re likely to forgive and not break up with you.

  1. Sleeping alone and in your own bed
 
 

I’m a starfish type of person, which means I like to spread out and have my space. I take joy in stretching my lanky limbs as far across the mattress as they will go. When you have to share a bed with someone else, you lose this freedom; this magical space. Instead, you have to crunch into a little ball, so that you each have enough room. Or even worse, you have to spoon. Yeah cuddling is super sweet and intimate and yadda yadda yadaa, but the logistics of it are painful. Cue the classic dead arm and face full or hair for the men, and the lumpy pillow with some hot breathe on the back of your neck for the women. Maybe stick to a brief cuddle and then go your separate ways.

  1. Friends
 


Chances are, we started dating because we liked each other, not each other’s friends. While I do think it is important to get along with your s/o’s friends, I don’t think this necessarily means having to listen to their annoying assess all the time. Group activities are fine and fun, but I don’t want to feel like I’m tagging along or interrupting friend bonding time.


  1. Looking good
 
 

Sometimes, you just want to be a slob. Does anyone else participate in scum bag Sundays? Just me? Okay, well I enjoy wearing my oversized sweatshirts with unwashed hair while watching Netflix. I don’t always want to have to shower or primp, so you can think I always casually look this good.

8. Grooming

 

This might go along with looking good, but applies to both sexes in a relationship. Grooming is a task that you don’t really need to partake in unless you know you’re getting some action..or maybe want to wear something more revealing. For men, you now have to maintain that facial hair, so you’re not turning women’s faces into a giant rash. For women, you have to be plucked, waxed, and moisturized until you resemble a basted Thanksgiving turkey. Of course there are those in the world who don’t care about such trivial matters, but they aren’t the ones looking at your naked body.

From dutch ovening yourself in bed to becoming a hairy monster, being single comes with wonderful perks and freedom. While being in a relationship can limit you in these various ways, it’s provides you with the most important and reassuring thing: the comfort in knowing there is someone out there willing to accept your weird ass.